


i had a dream that you were mine (i've had that dream a thousand times)

by MaiaSpeedster



Category: The Dark Artifices Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: F/M, Marriage Proposal, Post-Book 1: Lady Midnight, anyway, but it's nothing bad, i had this on my drafts for so long, i think, i thought it was time to finish it, there are a few thing i didn't tag bc it would be spoiler
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-23 12:03:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20007997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaiaSpeedster/pseuds/MaiaSpeedster
Summary: Julian proposes to Emma."Raziel, he was so in love with her. That thought made him even more excited for the proposal. He only hoped she would say yes."





	i had a dream that you were mine (i've had that dream a thousand times)

Julian was so excited to see Emma. (To be honest, he always was, but this time it was special.)

He had a surprise prepared for her, one he had been planning for a couple of weeks now. He had almost everything ready for it; the clothes he was going to wear, the food, the ring. One of the things missing was the setting, but since it was pretty early he didn’t see the point in preparing it now. He had plenty of time for it. The other thing was the letter but he was going to write it right before he went to the date.

Someone knocked on his room’s door, interrupting his thoughts. He got up from the bed and stretched; he had been sitting for a really long time, so he was feeling a little sore. When he opened the door he found himself face to face with his sister, Livvy. She had her hands intertwined behind her back and a big smile on her face.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi,” he answered. “Something’s wrong?” He knew he was exaggerating. She wouldn’t be smiling like that if something was wrong, but he couldn’t help it; he’d been paranoid his whole life, always worried something was going to shatter the little peace he and his family had. And even though things were getting better, it was hard not to be concerned. _Old habits die hard_ , he thought.

“Nope, I just wanted to know how you were doing with the preparations for today,” she said, still smiling.

Julian sighed. He had tried to keep his surprise a secret, unsuccessfully. He wanted everything to be perfect, so it took him a couple of days to elaborate the plan. During those days, he had been so distracted he: burnt breakfast, didn’t realize when someone was talking to him and, during training, he let himself be defeated easily. Of course, that was enough for Ty and Livvy to realize that something was up with their older brother. When they confronted him, he refused to tell them until they threatened to go ask Emma if she knew something. The fact that Emma hadn’t realized how distracted he had been those days was a miracle, so he didn’t see another choice but to tell them the truth.

“Everything’s fine, fortunately.”

“Do you need our help with something?” Livvy asked, her eyes shining with excitement.

“No, but thanks. Everything’s almost ready.” When he saw her disappointed look, he added “But if I find something you can help me with, I’ll tell you.”

Livvy didn’t seemed offended by this; her sad look was replaced by an affectionate one.

“Okay,” she said. “I’ll see you later then.” She smiled and went down the hall.

Julian got into his room, closed the door behind him and sat down on his bed again. He had to prepare his speech. Which was a problem, because he wasn’t particularly good with speeches. He said them a few times but he had never prepared them, they came from his heart. Seeing that the times he had let himself get carried away by his feelings his speeches had been pretty good, he decided to trust he could say one in the moment. It couldn’t be that bad, right?

He was about to lay down again when he heard footsteps outside his room. His heart started beating faster. He would recognize those steps anywhere. He opened the door and saw Emma with her hand raised as if she were to knock.

She smiled and said “I was just about to knock.”

Julian felt breathless. The sight of Emma always did that to him. “Yeah, I could see that.” He was very sure that the smile he had on his face was a dumb one but he found that he didn’t care. As long as she was here and his siblings were fine, he didn’t care about anything else.

“So,” said Emma, unclasping his hand from the doorknob and intertwining his fingers with hers. “I just came by to tell you that I was gonna patrol.”

Alarms rang inside Julian’s head. It must have been evident because Emma instantly said, cupping his face with her other hand “I’ll be fine; you don’t have to worry about me.”

“You do know that’s not gonna make me worry less, right?” He spoke softly, trying to calm himself. He caressed her hand with his thumb.

“I know, it’s cute,” she said.

Next thing he knew, he had her mouth pressed against his in a chaste kiss. He could swear his heart stopped beating; it always happened when they kissed. Although they’d been together for a year and a half now, he still couldn’t get used to being able to kiss her whenever he wanted and being reciprocated. After they split, she started marching down the hall.

“Be careful,” he said.

She turned around and walked backwards as she answered “Always am.”

“Respectfully disagree.”

She glared at him jokingly before cracking a smile. She turned around and walked away.

Raziel, he was so in love with her. That thought made him even more excited for the proposal. He only hoped she would say yes.

* * *

He looked at the watch in his left wrist; it was time. By the angel, he was so nervous he felt like fainting.

A few minutes after Emma went patrolling, he went down the beach to prepare what was left of the proposal and, in his opinion –and Livvy’s-, everything looked perfect. He had carried a table and two chairs himself and, with the help of the twins, who were happy to help him, set up the table. They had put a nice beige tablecloth and covered the chairs with a similar cloth of the same color. Candles were in the middle of the table, with two plates with cannelloni next to them and Julian had filled the glasses with water; the twins complained about this, saying that he should have filled them with wine, but Julian argued that water was healthier.

“Emma will be here any minute now, so you should go,” he said. He was wearing jeans and a nice t-shirt. He had wanted to wear a suit but Livvy, messing up his plan, had said it was too formal and that it was going to ruin the surprise.

Livvy’s smile was so radiant that looking at it seemed like looking at the sun. She looked at Ty and said “Let’s go.”

Ty grabbed Julian’s hand and squeezed it. “Good luck.”

Julian smiled and squeezed back.

Ty took Livvy’s hand and, after she waved at him, they went back to the Institute.

A while passed and Emma still wasn’t there; to say that Julian was beginning to worry was an understatement. He was very sure that the note he had left under her door said that he wanted to meet her at the beach at 8 p.m.; and it was 8:20.

Oh God, what if she knew about the proposal and didn’t show up because she didn’t want to marry him? What if she was late because she was thinking about ways to reject him? Or even worse, what if something had happened to her? He decided he would wait for her twenty more minutes; if she didn’t come, he would go to the Institute and look for her to make sure she was alright.

In the end, he didn’t have to wait that long.

He was standing by the table, worry in his eyes, when someone said “BOO!” and scared the shit out of him.

He turned around and saw Emma, dressed in a simple navy blue dress, her brown eyes shining with laughter.

“Don’t ever do that again,” he said, after calming down a little.

“Oh c’mon, you know it was funny,” she said between laughs.

He gave her a glare that expressed exactly his opinion that only made her laugh harder.

“Anyway, I’m sorry I was late,” she said once she stopped laughing. “I encountered a few demons on my patrol so my shower took longer than usual.”

Julian got caught off guard. “What? Are you okay?”

“Calm down,” she laughed. “I’m fine, really. It was nothing. Besides,” she took his hand,” when I saw your note I thought I had to dress better than I usually do. So I asked Cristina for help.”

He smiled as she continued “You should have seen her face!” She started laughing again. “I hadn’t even showered yet when I showed up at her door asking for help. I think I even messed up her rug.”

“I hope you’ll help her clean it,” he said, cupping her face with his hands.

“Of course, first thing tomorrow.”

She had a big smile plastered on her face. Julian loved to see her smiling and laughing so much, it was a sign of how happy she was.

“So,” she said, “what is all this about?”

“W-what do you mean?” He stuttered.

“Julian, I know you.” She put her hand over his and intertwined their fingers. “You don’t do things without a reason.”

Panic alarms started ringing in Julian’s head. _Oh, screw it_ , he thought. It was now or never.

He got on one knee and got the Blackthorn ring out of his pocket. “Emma Carstairs, I have loved you all my life, even if I didn’t know it at first. And you know why? Because when this universe was born, when it blasted into existence in fire and glory, everything that would ever exist was created. Our souls are made of that fire and glory, of the atoms of it, the fragments of stars. Everyone's are, but I believe ours, yours and mine, are made from the dust of the same star. Will you marry me?”

Tears were running down her face and, for a second, Julian thought they were tears of sadness, that she was going to reject him. But then, she kneeled in front of him and said “Yes.” She was full on sobbing now. “Yes, of course I will marry you.”

He took her hand and slid the ring on her finger. Once it was settled in, he helped her get on her feet and kissed her. Her mouth tasted salty because of her tears but it didn’t matter. They were going to become husband and wife; they were going to spend their whole lives together. This was everything Julian had ever wanted and more.

“You’re crying,” Emma said, resting her forehead on his.

It was true, Julian realized. “I’m happy.”

This time, it was Emma who kissed him.

* * *

Julian woke up with a shudder. He looked around, disorientated, and saw that he was on his room, not on the beach. And most importantly, Emma wasn’t there. She was never going to be his wife, not even his girlfriend, because she was his parabatai. And that was killing him.

He closed his eyes again, letting the tears fall free on his face and hoped that sleep would come soon.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you liked it even tho it doesn't have a happy ending. sorry not sorry. also, i added julian's speech from los bc it's one of my favourites and i wanted to include it. i also think it fits perfectly


End file.
